Finding Love from 2010 and Beyond
Is it my imagination or is it harder than usual to find love this year? Over the last couple of days, I have had to take a long hard look at my ever-growing inner and extended circle of friends, family and associates who are currently single and hoping to mingle.
Among both male and female, young and old, there is a recurrent theme song in the midst: ‘where are the good matches?’ It suddenly seems that in addition to the usual culprits scaring the wits out of persons recently returning to the dating scene due to divorce or widowhood, materialism and lack of integrity have overtaken commonsense on the list of ‘must-have’ qualities. Hence individuals with sterling qualities are remaining single for longer because it seems that both men and women alike are running financial background checks before they call or return a call. That’s on the one hand.
On the other hand, is another phenomenon that I will call ‘de-manning’ of the male folk by assertive modern women. Make no mistake, I am all for women’s liberation and all but things have gotten such that men-folk don’t need to lift a finger to get a woman these days. Women of all ages now take the initiative to seek and court men who catch their eye – regardless of the marital status of their prey. It used to be that respectable women gave a wide berth to a man wearing any kind of jewellery on his fingers – once upon a time. These days, young unmarried men sport rings in an attempt to get more female interest. The ladies are apparently less interested in single unattached men as they do not consider them a good catch. The married ones on the other hand are irresistible by the very fact that they are married, since that marital status suggests a man is financially secure enough to run a home – and have a mistress.
What this means is that men are losing their social skills as the suitor who seeks out his mate. Men have become increasingly passive to the point that a man meeting a female interest rather than ask for her number for fear of rejection, lazily hands her his and waits for the phone to ring. When she doesn’t call, he complains and sulks. Even teenage boys now wait to be pursued by girls. Say what? I am totally missing the punch line there. While it might seem like a more civilized way to do things, I fear that men are actually in danger of becoming completely emasculated. We might as well return to the days of the Amazons and maybe that is where we are all headed. Correct me if I am wrong but aren’t women truly the stronger of the two sexes? Women have innate emotional strength that men can only dream of and when it comes down to it, emotional strength gives staying power where brute force would have long caved in. Men have traditionally stayed relevant because they are required for procreation and to protect the female.
If men wimp out of the mating ritual in a world where women are financially independent, physically fit, have access to means of sexual gratification that exclude direct male participation and sperm banks to procreate, then male folk are in very clear danger of becoming obsolete altogether. So my response to male friends complaining about remaining single: “MAN UP!”
